Ashtapadi XII - yAmi hE kAmiha - Ode to the Lord

The Moon is rising
In the sky blue
Radha laments
For her delay

She has not met her Lord,
The Lord of all that is,
She tells her grief
To her confidante !


yAmi hE kAmiha - mArvA - yati
P prasarati SaSidhara bimbE
vihita vilambEcha mAdhavE vidhurA
virachita vividha vilApam
sA paritApam chakArOchchaihi||


kadhita samayEpi hari rahaha nayayau vanam
mama viphalamida mamala roopa mapi yauvanam
yAmi hE ka miha SaraNam
sakhee jana vachana vanchitam ||

The Lord had not come,
To Vrindavan.
At the promised time
What is the use?

Of my beauty and youth ?
Who is my Protector?
I am bamboozled
By other's talk !


yadanu gamanAya niSi gahana mapE Seelitam
tEna mama hrudaya mida masama Sara keelitam||yAmi||

I am exhausted,
Searching for Krishna,
During night,
In the forest !

He is vexing me,
I am devastated,
The arrows of Cupid,
Pierce my heart !

mama maraNamEva varamati vitadha kEtanA
kimiti vishahAmi virahAnala machEtanA||yAmi||

How can I endure,
Pangs of separation.
If Krishna be not here ?
Alone am I !

At this rendezvous
Death is welcome
Than this Viraha,
This separation from Self !


mAmahaha vidhura yati madhura madhu yAminee
kApi hari manubhavati kruta sukruta kAminee||yAmi||


Without my  beloved,
All is dross !
How painful the pangs,
Of separation !

God forbid if,
Some woman enjoys,
With Him,
May be due to her piety

ahaha kalayAmi valayAdi maNi bhushaNam
hari viraha dahana vahanna bahu dooshaNam||yAmi||


My heart is burning,
I cannot bear,
Pangs of separation,
From the Beloved !

Isnt Bhakti
A state wherein
There is no Vibhakti ?
Non separation from Self?

How can I separate
From my own Self
Which He is !
Ornaments are waste !


 kusuma sukumAra tanu matanu Sara leelayA
sragapi hrudi hanti mAmati vishama SeelayA||yAmi||

Ever flower garlands
Are causing pain,
In my body physiologic
And in body psychologic 1

Like Cupid's flower arrows,
Infested with erotic magnificence
They gnaw at me
Give me restless nights !


ahamihahi nivasAmi na vigaNita vEtasA
smarati madhusudanO mAmapi na chEtasA||yAmi||

How can Krishna be unmindful
Of my plight pitiable ? 
I will remain here,
Ignoring Vetas trees !

hari charaNa SaraNa jayadEva kavi bhAratee
vasatu hrudi yuvatiriva kOmala kalAvatee||yAmi||

This eternal Song
This Song of Songs
Of the poet Jayadeva
Is submitted at His Lotus Feet

The Liberating Feet,

Of the Lord of the Universe
Let these sweet lines
Remain in devotees hearts !



Translation By Govind Kumar